How to prepare a child for the arrival of a younger sibling

Knowing how to prepare a child for the arrival of a younger sibling is very important to keep the family together and prevent the child from feeling helpless when the new member appears.

To give you the best advice, at Cucamenta we have turned to a professional. This is Beatriz González, a psychologist at the Madrid psychology clinic Somos Psicologías .

The first thing you should know is that with the birth of another child, a series of reactions may appear in the family dynamics that affect the older siblings. These will depend on your age, your personality and the family dynamics already established.

What emotions are common when a little brother arrives?

“The mixture of emotions is common,” says González, from excitement and curiosity to insecurity and jealousy . “Some children may show enthusiasm and desire to help with the new baby, while others may feel displaced or fear losing their parents' attention,” she points out.

At this stage, regressive behaviors may also appear, such as asking for a pacifier again, tantrums or bed-wetting, as well as a demand for more attention. Families must be prepared, "offering a lot of love, patience, and assuring the child of his/her place in the family (preventing him/her from feeling displaced) and encouraging his/her participation in the care of the new sibling to facilitate a smoother transition," we Beatriz says.

Tips to adapt the child during pregnancy

• “It is an opportunity for you to adapt to the changes, understand and accept them,” says the psychologist, who provides the following advice.
• Involve the child : It is important to integrate him, helping him choose his clothes or toys, or prepare his room.
• Talk openly about what is to come : Explain in simple, age-appropriate words what awaits you with the arrival of the new baby. You can buy him a book or story adapted to his age or ask him about his fears and feelings.
• Visiting friends or family with babies : This way, the surprise factor will be reduced and the child will know what is to come.
• Create realistic expectations : The older child should know that babies require a lot of care and attention . “It is about explaining that there is no loss of attention or love towards the older child, but that for a time the new baby will require more care”
• Reinforce the role of older brother : “This is super important, since it gives him a leading role,” explains González. “We should talk about how important his role as an older brother will be and how he can be a good role model,” he recommends.
• Maintain routines : It will give you a great feeling of stability and security. You should avoid changing routines as much as possible so that their daily lives are not altered.

What to do when faced with strong emotions or behavioral problems

The child may experience incomprehension, anger, anxiety, jealousy, anger, sadness or incomprehension after the birth of the child. “It is super important to approach it with empathy and appropriate strategies, recognizing and validating the child's emotions.”

When your child is having a hard time, let him or her know that his or her emotions matter and that it is normal to feel this way, offering individualized attention and exclusive time in activities that he or she enjoys.

To feel useful and strengthen the bond between siblings, the child can get involved with tasks adapted to his age in caring for his little brother. Continuing to maintain constant daily routines to give him security and having open communication - actively listening without judging - are the other pillars so that he does not feel insecure.

Parents should encourage positive behaviors, showing how to manage emotions in a healthy way and teaching the child to do the same .

“If behavioral problems or negative emotions persist, you should consider consulting a child psychologist, as this can provide additional strategies and support for both the child and the family,” he highlights.

“In any case, it is essential to approach this situation with patience and love, which will help the child better adapt to the new family dynamic and develop a positive relationship with his younger brother.”